Note: this is not me, I am barely showing!
They are meant to hide the fact that you are in fact walking around with your trousers undone, but are still too small for maternity clothes. So I thought it would be a good idea to get some! I checked the online tracking thing that they provide and saw that apparently they had been delivered to our house and that the package had been left inside the front porch. We don't have a front porch. Hmmmm. I called the customer help line and explained the situation to them. They explained to me that they must have been delivered because that's what the couriers have reported. I went on to explain that yes, they may well have delivered them, but not to my house. So they refunded me and told me that if I wanted them to go into the store and get them. Fair enough. I didn't really need them at that point anyway and thought I would be able to go a couple more weeks without needing them.
A week later.....which is today.....
My trousers were feeling a little snug today. They felt a bit tight this morning but I thought to myself, I'm sure I'll be fine, I'll just hold myself in. All well and good, if you're holding in a stomach that doesn't have a baby inside. So my plan didn't quite work. Today, I had a fun day of walking around with my trousers undone. Luckily my top was long enough to cover it, otherwise it seriously would not have been a pretty sight!
This evening when I got home from work, lo and behold, there was a parcel on the doorstep. The bump bands had arrived. I'm guessing that they had in fact been delivered to the wrong house and they brought it to my door. As pleased as I was that I finally had bump bands which had arrived in my hour of need, I had been refunded for them and now, I had them. So the first thing I did was to call the customer service line again to let them know the situation and to try and sort it out. This is how it went:
Me: Hi, I ordered some bump bands a couple of weeks ago but they never showed up. Your tracking system said that they had been delivered but I never got them so you refunded me. They must have gone to a neighbour's house or something because today when I got home from work, they were on my doorstep. Can I pay for them over the phone?
Person: So you have them now then?
Me: Yes, I do.
Person: Obviously, I can't make you take them back to the shop, that IS your decision. But that's what we would advise.
Me: Well, the thing is, I actually do need them and want to keep them, so can I pay for it over the phone?
Person: We would advise that you take them back to the shop, but we can't make you, and it is your decision. Then they will refund you
Me: I'm not trying to steal them, I just want to pay for them. So if I take them back to the shop and they refund me, then I will have two refunds. I just want to pay for them.
Person: If you take them back to the shop, then they will refund you, then you can buy them back again.
Me: Then I still haven't paid for them because it will be the same situation that I am in now.
Person: Look, I can't make you take them back to the shop. But that's what we would advise that you do.
Me: Here is the situation. I need them now. Today I was walking around with my trousers undone, so they are very much a need. So, can I keep these ones then when I am able to, go into the store, have them put another lot of them through the till so that I can pay for them and then I won't take the other ones away, so I will have just paid for what I have.
Person: ...........sorry?
Me: (I explained it all again)
Person: Well, you can do that if you want, I can't tell you what to do, I can't make you pay for them, but we would advise that you go into the store.
Me: Thank you very much, goodbye.
Was I not speaking English? did I just not explain myself that well? Surely it shouldn't be that hard? So the upshot of it is, I am not stealing the bump bands. I never had any intention of doing that anyway. I will go into the shop on Saturday, pay for them and all will be merry and bright. I'm hoping that I will have more luck in the shop!